Bernardo Mendez-Getting the Love you want

July 14, 2017

Why do women settle in life, in marriage, in relationships? According to today’s guest, Bernardo Mendez, it’s because they lack a sincere understanding of their worth. There is a temptation to settle for less when you don’t quite know what you, YOURSELF, can bring to the table. Bernardo’s greatest passion in life is to help women find this self-worth and the ways to achieve what they really need from within. Tune-in as Bernardo also shares the role energy plays in relationships, why TODAY is the best time to be a woman, and the 3 ways to finding your true light.

  • Today’s episode guest is Bernardo Mendez
  • Relationships are one of Giovanna’s favorite topics
  • Bernardo stepped into relationship coaching because it’s one area that affects everything else in a person’s life
    • It impacts how a person shows up
  • Many people don’t realize that the old paradigm of relationships is not working
  • Bernardo’s decision to start relationship coaching
    • When he finally found something powerful that worked for him, he wanted to share it with people in a meaningful way
    • He started coaching his friends and friends of his friends
    • Working with women is more exciting and challenging than working with men
    • He recognized it was an area that makes a difference for him
    • “The key to fearing out relationships is fearing out yourself”
  • Bernado finds that one of the biggest reasons why single women don’t find the love they want is because they’re not feeling their sense of worth
    • Women are sometimes doubtful of what they bring to the table
    • Giovanna also gets stuck and doubtful in regards to what she brings
  • Bernardo helps women raise their vibrations to a sense of knowing their worth
  • There are two levels of worth: questioning if you’re special enough to do things and being the vessel of a light
  • The purpose of anyone’s gifts and lights is to expand it and share it to other people
  • When someone can hold you in the light of who you are, eventually you start to believe and see it for yourself
  • Bernardo’s work is about helping women find the way to meet their needs that fulfills them in the long-term
  • “‘Void summoning’ literally means that you summon a partner from your void”
  • If we learn to fill the emptiness in ourselves, we don’t have to take the crap that we’re presented with
  • What a man really wants is for a woman to bring her light
    • Giovanna, in the past, felt she had to dim her light
    • She molded to what she thought people wanted her to be
    • How you start a relationship is how it’s going to contain you
  • 2 ways to enter a relationship is by entering full OR by entering with a lesser version of yourself
  • If a man doesn’t want the REAL you, you don’t need him in your life
    • Let go of that thing that hinders you from getting the best that you deserve
    • “Expressing your truth is part of getting uncomfortable at the risk of getting rejected for something better”
    • One goal for adults is to re-parent themselves
    • The most common form of self-love is self-care
    • There are times that you just have to say NO
  • “It’s easy to confuse fear from intuition”
  • There is a lot of growth from discomfort
  • “We’re in a culture that recycles relationships”
  • Figure out what you want, who you must be, how can you step into it, and how you can create fulfilment in the process
  • If you start a relationship from lack, then that’s what you’ll feel
  • Right now is the first time in history that women can have it all
    • “You are not an outcast if you’re not married these days”
    • Bernardo’s grandma’s job description was do everything her husband wanted and to take care of the household and kids
    • Before, women serve their husband and family first and themselves, last
    • Most women prefer to not have to take charge all the time
  • It’s exhausting for feminine energy to be doing masculine activities
    • Women who are more masculine attract more feminine men
    • Masculine, in its truest essence, would be the absence of feeling
    • The healthy masculine has the ability to stand in his truth and listen to his woman when he needs to
    • The healthy feminine has the ability to stand in her truth, be more open, and recognize when she needs to be logical and taking action
    • A man ultimately who’s in his masculine will be happy to serve than to be served
  • Measure in different ways – not in monetary terms
  • Women judge themselves in so many hard ways
  • Men want to feel alive
  • Women help men feel things they cannot feel on their own
  • Finding your light and feeling comfortable in that is the truth of who you are
  • 3 ways to see the light:
    • Be honest with yourself in terms of where you are
    • Find a way to increase your light
    • Get support
      • Mentorship is the highest and quickest form for change
    • Time is your main drawback
    • There will be ups and downs, everyday
    • What you’ll do will be a decision of commitment
    • Leave your comments on She Rises website
    • Connect with Bernardo on his website
    • End of today’s podcast

 

3 Key Points:

  1. Women do NOT need to depend on men for identifying who they ARE and what they are capable of.
  2. One way to start increasing your self-worth is to take care of and LOVE yourself.
  3. Find your light—the truth of who you are—and share that to the world.

 

Resources Mentioned:

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